10 Ways How to Hate Running

I hope you get some good laughs after reading these two lists.   I know I always love reading things like this, because it is so untrue.  As a disclaimer, (and because I love you all too much to let you hate running), do not do any of these, it will make you never lace up your shoes again nor have an awesome relationship with Jesus!

Want to Hate Running? Here are 10 things that will ruin your love for running:

1. Eat a large meal full of carbohydrates, fats, and sugary foods within 20 minutes of a long run.
2. Never plan your workouts, always head out the door 30 minutes before a meeting.
3. Never warm up your muscles before a run, it takes too much energy that you could easily be saving up for extra miles.
4. Always go out for a three mile run no matter how you feel.
5. Never cool down, you want your body to get used to repairing itself without your help.
6. Don’t worry about niggles, they will heal on their own.
7. Always go straight into the fastest pace you possible can within the first mile of every easy run, that way you will be forced to keep a slow pace later on.
8. Over pack for long runs, you never know what you may need.  And don’t forget the chocolate brownies!
9. Never go to the bathroom before heading out, it takes all the fun out of looking for port-a-potties.
10. Don’t wear good shoes, they cost too much and are better left for collectors.  Save the money for races and buy some cheap sneakers.

Want to Hate the Christian Life? Here are 10 things that will ruin your love for God:

1. Never read your bible, it takes up too much time.
2. Never talk to God, that’s just weird and no one wants to hear what you’re praying about.
3. Always take the credit for everything good in your life; it will lift your spirits.
4. Spend many hours a day wasting time and sitting around, God commands us to rest right?
5. Never surrender to Christ, it makes you look weak.
6. Never ever ask God for help.  If we always ask God for help, how are you going to learn to become victorious?
7. Always meditate on worldly mantras so you can become a better person.
8. Hang around unbelievers as much as possible so you can be a witness to them.
9. Over analyze everything and become a judge in every argument
10. Never give thanks to God or people.  It is awkward for them when they don’t know what to say and God already knows you are grateful anyway.

What is the worst piece of advice someone has given you as a Christian or as a runner?  Comment below, I’d love to hear from you!

The next post will be on How to Love Running so stay tuned.

Happy Running Ya’ll!  See ya next time!