A Letter to my Younger Self
Where am I?
Currently I’m not where I thought I would end up. But, if you’ve read my latest posts, you already know my life has taken a life altering turn. Over the last two years God has opened my eyes to so many things. I am not the same person I was in November of 2023. However, being a changed person doesn’t always mean, changed circumstances. And right now, I am going through a lot.
Often I think, looking at others’ lives that there is no reason for me to be upset about what is going on right now. I have tried to practice gratitude and though this is a good thing, as it has helped me to focus on the good in my life, it has also caused me to not talk about what is currently bothering me.
Rather than get it out, I shove it down, allowing it to fester in my heart. It threatens to cause bitterness, depression, or self focus.
I feel as though I can’t ask for a listening ear, for a comforting word, or a reasurring hug. It feels selfish. The thought that runs through my head is that I can’t become a burden to the people I trust or else I won’t have anyone… They will abandon me. But then I also have the thought running through my head that perhaps just as I want to be there for others, they want to be there for me.
Where is my heart?
As I have thought and prayed about my past, present and future, a poem crossed my mind. What would I say to my younger self if I could back?
This peom is for anyone who was hurt as a little girl and had no one there to care for them. It subtly touches on the lack of Christian discipleship. Families are great to rear up godly adults, but not everyone has the privelge of being born into a healthy Christian home. This is when we can be there for one another, creating special bonds as Paul and Timothy did in the bible.
My heart for sharing this poem is to encourage each lady to be the person they wish they would have had when they were younger. Not only do we need people to be there for us, there are others who need us to be there for them. And often, if we can get our eyes off of ourself and onto loving others, it eases the pain of our own circumstances.
Be Still and Run 