Living in the country where there are miles of fields, the wind has nowhere to go but straight – and hard! A lot of times on a windy day I will try and plan it to where I run into the wind on the way out, that way when I’m sweating and tired on the way back the wind is blowing at my back, keeping me from cooling down too fast, but also helping to push me forward. Sometimes I miss judge the wind direction, but other times I may purposefully choose to run against the wind for some extra “strength training”.
When the wind is to your back pushing you along the road God has you on, it can be a very encouraging and helpful feeling. But what happens when that wind changes direction and you feel like everything is against you. Every hair on your head, every muscle in your body, every sinew, every tendon; they all feel like they are pulling you backwards, like you are suddenly carrying a hundred extra pounds on your back. Do we still run forward or do we collapse on the ground in frustration and tears?
Last month I got to test this theory out really well. Once or twice a year, for the last four years, we have held a widows banquet in our home. When I woke up the Friday morning before the banquet, I was so looking forward to holding it this year, but we had to cancel. All the time and energy put into getting this day together felt wasted. I had a sudden attack from my adversary, Satan. The first arrow he shot I was not ready for and it hit with force. I was overcome with emotions. I felt useless, like my life had no point, why was I even here anyway? And they just kept spiraling out of control.
Running forward may not always be easy, it may not always be enjoyable, but no matter what, if you keep going, God will use you in many ways. He created each of us for a purpose, but we have to choose, even when the adversary comes against us, to cast him away and cry out to God for strength. Most runners, no matter the circumstance, will push themselves beyond what they think their bodies are capable – this is how we get stronger. The wind isn’t our only adversary, there are many trials along the way, and many situations that we can either choose to allow ourselves to give up and refuse to move forward, or slow down and persevere through the difficulty.
As I washed dishes for all the food and desserts we had prepared for the banquet I began crying out to God in my heart for help. I realized I was dwelling on self-pity not even thinking about how others might feel. I tried to focus my thoughts on God and resist the temptation to dwell on any negative or selfish thoughts. And I gave thanks! If you haven’t noticed a pattern yet, my New Year’s Resolution for 2019 was to obtain a grateful heart and I have been weaving that into a lot of my posts. It really is a life changer, but it is not easy.
I encourage you all to not resist running into the wind, for it is on those days that God makes you a stronger Christian. Find someone to run with you during those hard days, (Jesus is an amazing friend!), and persevere till the end. Let God strengthen you! Many times I find myself thinking life would be so much easier without the wind, but could you imagine how boring life would be?